I Thought Marie Kondo Was Going to Make Me Feel Bad About Myself

I would like to preface this post with a spoiler: she did not make me feel bad about myself. So if that's all you wanted to know, then there. You've officially survived one of my blog posts while reading only one sentence and seeing one photo.

I'd first heard about Marie Kondo years ago when her book The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up: The Japanese Art of Decluttering and Organizing first came out quite a few years ago. It was huge, at least in the online community that I was involved in. People seemed to be hopping headfirst onto the decluttering bandwagon but I was kind of uninterested in the whole process, considering I was like, in high school and decluttering was the least of my worries at the time. My worries were most likely revolved around whatever teenage insecurity that I was worried about at the moment and when the hell the Jonas Brothers were going to put out new music.

Flashforward to like, three weeks ago when the Marie Kondo explosion happened for the second time in my personal life with her Netflix show Tidying Up With Marie Kondo went live on the streaming platform. For the second time, I was bombarded with the question of whether or not I was going to fall victim to this de-cluttering nonsense. I'm not a packrat by any means. Truthfully, my only possessions are a few books and magazines, beauty products, my tiara, and my clothes. I was so focused on the aspect of decluttering as a solution to hoarding that I sort of turned my back on it.

If I'm being entirely honest, I thought it was going to be one of those cult-like things that was going to make me feel like a horrible person, somewhat similar to how hardcore vegans and ethical consumers communicate with the rest of society. I think there can be education without judgment and resentment within reason. This is probably another conversation for another time, so before I digress too much, let's hop right back into this post.

I made a snap judgment and out of fear, avoided this show for about a week and a half while the internet exploded with support for it. It's not that I don't like to be challenged or educated because I do. I love learning about new things in a supportive and non-judgmental atmosphere. I'm 23, I don't know everything nor will I ever know or understand everything but I at least want to try. In my head, if I watched the show I felt like I was going to be signing up for hours of feeling judged for owning possessions and for holding onto certain things. 

Ignorance is not always bliss, my dudes. I almost missed out on a really uplifting show and concept that brings a positive light on what it means to declutter and organize your life without the incredible pressures of trying to clean out the extra nonsense in your life, a task that even writing out seems daunting, let alone trying to turn it into a reality.

I'm sure it's not a surprise to anyone, but Marie Kondo is a soft-spoken woman who embraces a positive approach to tidying up your life and showcases empathy towards something that we typically don't think our–our belongings, rather than other people. Empathy is something I feel like a lot of society is missing, but again, another story for another time.

I'm not here to talk about all of the steps. If you really want to know those, Google them, read her book, or watch the show. However, you want to consume Kondo's tips, really. I'm just here to talk about how I was wrong. Not for the first time in my life and certainly not for the last. 

The KonMari approach isn't super black and white, at least not to me. I'm sure from the outside, it seems like there are two simple approaches: it sparks joy and you keep it or it doesn't spark joy and you get rid of it. I feel like this caused a bit of a controversy within the book/bookstagram community and in reality, I don't think it's that deep. Her entire method isn't based around getting rid of every single belonging that serves no purpose for you. She isn't sticking her middle finger up at sentimental items (though how funny is that mental image?)

It really is a simple question. Does something spark joy? Even if it's not a yes or no question in all instances, it's a question that transcends categories. Do I need all of the magazines I've been hoarding since high school? Probably not, so mom, if you're reading this and want to recycle all of those, go ahead. Do I need my absurd collection of turtlenecks that I wear on a daily basis and make me feel confident in myself? Hells yeah, those bring me more joy than any man ever has and ever well. 

If anything, this show gave me the swift kick in the ass that I needed to stop pretending that I was a "fauxdult" who can avoid anything and everything in her life. Sometimes I just need those little things that force me to reflect on my life and remember that while yes, I'm only 23 and that's young, I'm also old enough to live on my own hundreds of miles from my parents in one of the biggest cities in the world and pay rent and work independently and drink alcohol and vote and and and–

So, to Marie Kondo, who will never read this but I'm going to address her anyways, I'm sorry for being a judgmental piece of shit and not giving your show a fair chance at first. 

Sweatshirt: Zara

Skirt: Bershka

Tights: Target

Boots: Kate Spade

Sunglasses: Forever21

Purse: Rebecca Minkoff

Photos by Austen Tosone