I Don't Know How to Accessorize

There are two things that are missing from all of my outfit photos: a smile and an accessory that isn't a pair of sunglasses or a handbag. I don't know if you've noticed, but I don't accessorize and that is partially because I don't know how to properly accessorize. And then, of course, the fact that I actually hate wearing jewelry doesn't really help my cause either...

I've never really been a fan of earrings. I used to wear them with I was a kid but at some point in elementary school, maybe third or fourth grade, I slept on Halloween night with a pair of tiny spider studs in my ears and the little legs on the earrings got stuck to my pillow and I woke up in the middle of the night sobbing because there was a pillow attached to the side of my head. After that moment, I can tell you exactly when I would've worn earrings again. My brother's wedding in the fall of 2007, my homecoming junior year of high school, and maybe a few rare times during my senior year. You get your earring stuck to a pillow in the middle of the night one time and it ruins earrings for you for the rest of your life.

It's not just earrings either though. I'm not a huge ring person because I play with them all day and get distracted by them on my fingers. I try to wear my David Yurman ring that I got as a graduation present from my old co-workers as much as possible but I play with it constantly and I'm afraid one day it's just going to drop somewhere and become lost forever. 

Necklaces and bracelets aren't any exceptions, either. Listen, I've been on this planet for 22 years now. I know what suits me and what doesn't at this point. Like, bangs are not my thing, v-necks are not flattering on me, body-con anything is not a style I can rock, and the list goes on and on. Pendant necklaces look awkward on me, probably because I wear turtlenecks 99% of the time. I was a necklace person for approximately two or three years in high school because we had uniforms (take a shot every time I mention that I wore uniforms on this blog) and necklaces were like, the only form of creative expression we had. I would buy the cheapest, arguably ugliest crap from Forever21 and Charlotte Russe so I had variation but I don't think throwing on an ugly long necklace with a white polo and black skort really counts as "accessorizing." 

And before I rant any longer, bracelets and I don't vibe because I hate when I'm writing and typing and they hit the desk or table I'm working on. It's just distracting and I already have enough distracting thoughts in my head (always revolving around the male musicians I have crushes on) that I don't need to deal with a bracelet too.

I tend to solely rely on my outfit to make enough of a statement where accessories aren't necessary. Sometimes I'll throw on a scarf and hope for the best but really, that's just one more thing I'm wearing that will try to ruin my hair and I spend too much time in the morning trying to curl it to let it get tangled in a scarf and automatically become pin straight. Why do you guys think I wear lipstick so often? It's my lazy way at "accessorizing" or just adding something extra to the look so it's not just an outfit with nothing else. 

Do you ever see people with cute statement jewelry on and get all weird and heart eyes because in theory it looks so good but in practice, it's so uncomfortable? I just want to wear jewelry and not find it bothersome and a pain to wear!!! Give me all of the statement earrings from BaubleBar and the tiny dainty necklaces that people layer and never seem to tangle and somehow sleep in? What is this sorcery?!

If you see me wearing more jewelry in the future, this conversation with myself worked. And if not...then it is #confirmed that I am very stubborn.

Sweater: Target

Jacket: Zara

Pants: Gap

Shoes: Adidas

Scarf: Urban Outfitters (I think?)

Sunglasses: Dior